Thursday, July 28, 2011

Cannibalism, my friends, is barely tolerable.

If you're easily offended by the act of eating puerto rican children, or are from Children's Aid and could possibly sue me and/or send the mafia after me, skip this post. And if I don't offend you, please tell me, and I'll be sure to do it next time.

I was in the kitchen earlier and I was stirring a pot of curried chicken, when my dad yelled from the other room what smelled so good, when I apparently heard him wrong. Here's how it went.

Dad: What smells so good!?


Me: Little children in curry!


Dad: Do we have the Puerto Rican kind??

Me whispering to my mom: Did dad just ask us if we were cooking Puerto Rican children with curry?

My mom: Uhm...No. He asked if it was the spicy kind of curry.

I think she's just covering up his addiction to puerto rican children. He's probably been importing chunks of puerto rican orphan meat for years, and hasn't come out with it yet.

It's Okay, dad. I get it. I totally understand why you wouldn't be open about this. I know how cruel the mobsters can be about not paying them in time for their orphan meat.
(Obviously he's been buying it through the mafia all this time. Don't judge me)

By the way, I was totally joking (really.) about cooking children, it's actually chicken, but my dad totally jumped the gun on the whole "Let's-eat-Puerto Rican-children" deal.

~XCenedra (Su-Ned-Ra)

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