I Hate My Misfortune...

So today I got thrown up on by an old man who didn't speak English.
Yes, you heard me right.
Even now, since it's been at least 6 and a half hours since it's happened, I feel like I could cry about it.
It may have been the second nastiest thing I've experienced in my life. The first being accidentally eating hand lotion...I don't recommend eating hand lotion that's cinnamon flavored, if any of you were ever to eat hand lotion.

Anyway, the story goes, I was walking back home from school,  and I was just mindin' my own business, walking down the street like a boss, and a bus comes up beside me, and pulls into the bus stop that's in front of me. Just as I'm walking passed the bus stop, an old man stumbles out, and projectile vomits on my shirt, (thankfully, and mysteriously missing my favorite light blue skirt I was wearing earlier) and the pavement area around me.
And now I know I'm making this whole situation all like and airy, but let me make myself clear. HE THREW UP. ON ME. ME!
Do you have any idea how utterly disgusting that is?!
Some man, who I didn't even know, emptied his stomach content on my person!


As soon as it happened, I had one of those moments that never leaves you no matter how much you want to forget it.
 It was the kind of moment when you're standing there in shock, and you don't know what to do, and you're body is all tense, and then once you snap out of it you think, "What the HELL just happened!? Oh dear God."

So there I am, soiled with a mans vomit...just standing there in shock. If I wouldn't have been around other people, I would have sat down, and started crying. I'm not talking about the girly "pretty" crying you see in movies. I would have man cried. You'll understand that term if you've ever seen a man cry hysterically.

I had to fight with myself with everything I had, to stop myself from throwing up as well.

So, I looked at the man, then turned around an walked away, and started going back home again. The man didn't apologize. Didn't say anything. I don't believe he even spoke English.

So I got home, ripped off my clothes as soon as I dropped my bag off in my room, and ran into the bathroom, put my clothes in the tub, and took the hottest shower I've ever had in my life.

The physical evidence of the event may not be there anymore...But the emotional scars will never go away...

~XCenedra (Su-Ned-Ra)

Birthday sex and unicorns

So, today's my birthday.
I think one of the most amusing birthday wall posts I've gotten today was "Happy day of expulsion from your mother's womb."

I am happy that I was expelled from her.

On the weekend I had a few friends over and we went to the beach..At that beach, I don't think you want to know what happened, but I'm going to tell you all anyway.

My friends Jessie and Jen were with me at the beach (Shout out to you two!) and on the way there, we were saying that we hope we don't see any old men in speedos...I think we jinxed the CRAP out of ourselves.

Meet the Duff Man. That's what Jen dubbed him as.

It kind of looks like he's going to dominate that child in front of him, and while he may not look that old on that picture, he definitely was.

There was one point during the day where we were climbing out of the water, and The Duff Man was splayed out on a beach towel...I think if we had kicked his butt, it would have jiggled like a giant bowl of jell-o.

At the end of the beach trip, we were all sitting on our towels When Jessie said "The only way this can get better if there was a midget massaging us." So we then decided that we wanted an albino midget masseuse named Wilfred.

Any albino midget masseuse readers, call me. I need your little midgets hands....

Any way, on a different note, I finished my unicorn for Cece,

I'm rather proud of it. I think I will name her Cupcake face. Every time I see it I just wanna eat something...I can hear my hips complaining about that now.

~XCenedra (Su-Ned-Ra)